As humans, we border on an OBSESSION of control.
We are control freaks - we want everything the way we want it. If we cannot have it that way, we will try to force the universe’s hand
Let’s do a thought experiment and see what we can ACTUALLY control in this life.
1. How much you put yourself out into the world #
You cannot control your first impression or what others think of you. You can only put yourself in front of more people. Eventually, you will find those people that love and value you if you do it enough.
2. Your mindset #
Contrary to popular belief, your mind is the MOST CONTROLLABLE aspect of your existence.
You can decide right here and now to see things positively. You can create your outlook on this world and use that to shape your entire life. You can DECIDE to be happy, grateful, and to live in the here and now. Nothing makes be more angry than when people say they cannot control their mindset.
They simply haven’t tried.
3. Your patience #
You can decide to be patient. You can decide to be calm.
Going through life with a hair trigger temper is fucking lame.
4. Your physicality #
I know first hand that you could break your back and be wheelchair bound. That’s not what I mean.
What I mean by this is that you can choose to move as a human being should. I’ve been in unbearable pain - movement is the only thing that consistently alleviates this pain.
Unless you are completely incapacitated and paralyzed (I was from the waist down) you do not have an excuse.
The people that will criticise me on this one have no ground to stand on.
5. The way you treat others #
Even if someone is completely rude to you, you can decide to treat them better than they treat you.
If someone is a complete asshole to you, consider the source.
It may not even be YOU they are mad at.
6. Being on time #
Yeah, traffic, blah blah. You can choose to leave 5 minutes early.
Nothing shows more disrespect than being chronically late. Nothing shows more respect than being early for your engagements.
7. How you listen #
You can control shutting the fuck up for a few minutes.
8. How you spend your time #
You get 24 hours in a day, the same as anyone else.
You can create or you can consume.
You can decide to watch Lameflix and jerk off.
Or you could be writing, reading, building, seeking. The choice is up to you.
9. The people you surround yourself with #
If the people around you are not making you better, or you feel that you are on a different wavelength STOP HANGING OUT WITH THEM.
Humans are social creatures, and we rise to the occasion, as well as fall to the lowest common denominator.
There are losers and winners in life.
Surround yourself with those that are winners or are on their path to winning.
Seek actual connection.
Do not seek to gain from others without giving.
Look for depth of character. Everything else is a waste of time.
10. Your inputs #
In addition to your mindset and outlook on life, you can decide what you focus on, what you are allowing into your mind.
You can control what you read, what you watch, what you listen to.
You can move conversation away from the banal and into whatever depth suits you.
Control what you can control